Recently my old laptop died. I hadn’t even begun to start moving things to this Mac yet, and unfortunately, I had not backed up any files in quite sometime. I lost tons of writing, hours of sound work, and thousands of photographs. I felt gutted… like a part of me had died, and of course, it had. So much of my heart and soul gone forever. It’s hard to see the positive in all of this. However, maybe it had to be. Perhaps that is the only way one can start over fresh.
You see, I’ve been intrigued with the idea of “rebooting” myself.
So I have started this reboot in earnest, trying to get myself out of this creative rut that has plagued me of late, and back to a good place both physically and mentally. I’ve been exercising a lot, getting back into zazen and learning Tai Chi. I’ve even quit drinking beer! Maybe it’s partly because I’m getting older, or partly because of this creative stasis , but regardless of the reason, the results have been fruitful. Mind, body, and soul I have been feeling much better than I have in years.
I received validation for my efforts at my yearly physical today, I cut weight, and my blood work was excellent… and for everyone wondering where in the world vegetarians/vegans get their protein, my proteins were high and healthy. I’m not usually one to post stuff like this, but I thought maybe I would for the benefit of anyone else out there in a rut. I figure if I can “reboot”, anyone can.
I feel compelled to write a few words as we head into the final hours of 2016, and I type them here in the factory where I will ring in the new year. Fitting and hauntingly poetic that I will end the year and begin a new one from this factory laboratory where I spend the majority of my time.
2016 was a year like any other with several vicissitudes. We lost Bowie, we lost Prince, and we lost Lemmy. A tumultuous political year divided the country and unfortunately dropping a new year’s ball will not fix the dark days that lie ahead for this country. However, politics will always be politricks and as much as the election has dominated television and social media, it has not defined my year.
The year has treated me well, I made it through it alive and unscathed while my family is all with me, healthy and happy. The job that I complain about so much has afforded me to be the most comfortable I have ever been. Life is good, and when it’s not, it is usually because of my own perspective. I’m often my own worst enemy.
Creatively, it was a slower year than I care to admit. However, I am very proud of the handful of things I have done this year. I have had some of my best work published in some of my favorite experimental journals, Otoliths, Ex-Ex Lit, and the Zoomoozophone Review. I had the honor to play a show with Mark Hosler (of the legendary Negativland) this year as one-half of Blk/Mas. We also made our annual stop at this year’s St Pete Noise Fest. New net albums by both me, and Blk/Mas hit the web this year.
In 2017, I am looking to shake off my apathy, polish up and start shopping around two chapbook manuscripts I am sitting on. I also hope to do more shows, and release a lot more noise as well. I’m not much of a resolutions guy, but if anything, I just hope to be a little less apathetic in the coming year and nurture the creative fire that still burns inside of me.
If anyone is reading this I’d just like to say, Happy New Year! Stick around; it’s going to be a fun year.
Today I received my contributor copy of And/Or volume 3, and it is a thing of beauty. Within the cover you’ll find over 150 pages of experimental poetry and prose. I’m very proud to be included. From their site:
“and/or is an international print journal devoted to publishing experimental creative writing and graphic art by writers and artists from around the world.”
You can find more info here.